Pros and Cons of Life
God you are great! You have designed a video game of my life and having pleasure playing it. I'm, on the other hand, trying all the time to figure out pros and cons of living your video game life to decide whether it is worth living in a virtual world.
1. Screw up as much as you want in life. You can always reload your life from a previous point or re-spawn again for another chance at life.
2. Didn't get any sleep last night? Burning the candle at both ends? Grab a power up item and watch your energy level return.
3. Best looking body in the game. That's right. Heroes and heroines always have the best looks out of all the characters -- never worry about being ugly again.
4. Being able to perform the most amazing, impossible tasks without losing any limbs or teeth. You'll be able to scale walls with ease, jump large distances over pits and take out small armies simply by performing a spin attack. Acts of bravery will help you score with everyone and media will call you Super Hero.
5. Free stuff available everywhere. Food, clothes, money and everything else you need to get through life will be available for free in parents' home, may be in people's home as well.
6.Cheat codes. Basically you’d have the ability to do whatever the hell you want with just the right button sequence. Of course, you have to find the codes first though and hoard them away from your friends, so they don’t have the ability to input codes too.
And so on...
1. Monsters, monsters and more monsters. Everywhere you go in the world, there will be monsters and you'll spend more time killing them or running away from them than going showering.
2. Annoying music. All day long you’ll have to listen to your theme music playing unless you go into a shop or a dungeon, then you’ll be treated to different annoying music. You better hope to God that someone didn’t program your life game with midi themes or you’ll never be sane again.
3. Freeze ups. Imagine driving down the street and the whole world freezes up. Waiting for the world to get moving would be a real pain in the neck, especially if it’s the tenth time that day and you’re late for work.
4. Single Story-line. Instead of being able to do anything and go anywhere you wish, your game life was programmed with a single plot line which you must follow to the letter till death.
5. People asking you for money or items. “Can I borrow your car? I’m going on an urgent appointment and my car just broke down.” “Hey, can I get 500 bucks from you? I really need to buy that power band and I’m a little short.”
6. Think of the taxes. Never ending and not really worth what you get from them.
And so on...
Oh God! Could you kindly press a button on your video game so that all the cons vanish and I only have the pros to live my life. I don't mind even if that would make my life mundane.